I tell one particular lie almost every day without blinking an eye. I lie on application forms, on surveys and always, always on the elliptical machine (okay, I tell TWO lies on that one). I lie about my age. It started innocently enough—after moving to a new city, I began to realize that several of my friends were younger than me. Sometimes we’d talk and I would reference Peter Falk as “Columbo”, or the old school dance, the Bump. My friends would look at me with bewilderment, then surprise as they realized I was older than they thought, and now had to reconfigure their perception of me.
My friends and I are also guilty of perpetuating this conflict. When we hear that an actress is older than we thought (Sally Field is 60 years old? Holy Flying Nun, Batman!) we’ll say how she looks good for her age. As if upon turning the age of 50, she was supposed to have turned into a hag, but somehow has been able to subvert the forces of nature and still look attractive. You know the world isn’t right when Halle Berry is now categorized not as one of the most beautiful people, but as one of the most beautiful people OVER 40!
One thing I’ve recently discovered, however, is that if I really were the age I’ve been claiming, I would have missed out on a few things. I’ve only recently started playing tennis like a mad woman, letting my Serena side come out on the court. Before that, I was still tentative, still apologizing for every mistake I made, still wary of letting that total “leave it out there on the court” mentality to come out. I have more definite opinions about things, and I’m just fine sharing them even before I’m asked. At the same time, I also have more compassion because I’ve walked in more shoes over time. I have more confidence now to do what I think is best—for our family, and for me, and not offer as many excuses or apologies.
It’s my life-training program, if you will, that can’t be put on the fast track. For it’s optimum effectiveness, this portion couldn’t be completed in less than—shall I say it?—44 years.
LOL! Yes, it happens that way, doesn’t it? At 47, I think “Wow, that’s pretty close to 50!” Like you, I wouldn’t have wanted to miss out on lessons learned and life observed (hasn’t the world changed since, say, 1980?! Or has it just become more brazen?). And the feeling of being sure where one stands and not allowing outside forces rattle my cage b/c we must do what’s best for all concerned is ‘priceless’! Thanks for the good thoughts about the wonders of ‘growing up’!!
Comment by Odale — January 2, 2008 @ 12:26 pm |
Thanks for the comment. Strange to think that we’re STILL not grown up sometimes!
Comment by thewritinggenie — January 3, 2008 @ 3:47 pm |